Loan Ranger: A rude awakening in South Africa

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Loan Ranger: A rude awakening in South Africa

loan ranger

Loan Ranger was thrilled at the prospect of his impending trip to South Africa, until a leveraged loan banker gave him pause with a cautionary tale…

After a busy week of gun-slinging, Loan Ranger, Tonto and Silver were relaxing at the saloon on Friday with the leveraged loan official. Several glasses of moonshine into the evening, the conversation took a dark turn into realms reminiscent of the 13th Pan Book of Horror Stories.

“Hey, here’s a scoop,” said the fellow.

He unfolded a sinister set of events, which revealed that his own trip to the rainbow nation for a conference did not go as well as might have been hoped.

Upon waking one morning, our protagonist had felt an unusual discomfort, becoming excruciating, in his poephol – to use the local terminology. We believe it's pronounced like the ancient English word 'poophole'.

Upon visiting the doctor, the cause of this consternation was found to be eight legged – and still alive…

And the intrepid banker’s pain and horror had only just begun. For to extract his newfound arachnid acquaintance, the doctor produced a gigantic syringe and explained that its immediate insertion into the place of discomfort would be required to remove the perpetrator.

It is often complained that getting African loans over the line takes a lot of sweat work, but this surely counts as above and beyond the call of… er… duty. 

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